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    • Thanks for you response changing paradigm.
      After reading you essay one thing is sure your current affairs are very strong. Using them wisely will boost your essay score.
      Analysis:
      1.Your knowledge base is good you talked from India to America, Madagascar etc
      2.You have the capability to bring multidimensional analysis (as you wrote about historical, social,economic, political aspects )
      3.Your facts are strong this helps in presenting your argument convincingly.
      But some parts require improvement like :
      1.Please stick to the topic only, don’t digress like you discussed problems of India bcoz topic is “Geography remains but history didn’t ” & not “Progress of India in various sectors “.
      2. Your idea to start with story is good but try to be brief.
      3.Focus on grammar. You used word deported (meaning expelling from a country) for person stepping down from train
      or ‘India goes through ups & down from tribal to colonial ‘ it should be went
      4.Develop a flow in writing. The essay seems like a collection of individual paragraphs on various aspects make them look cohesive.
      You can write marvellous essays given you knowledge base & analytic skills.
      So keep writing. Waiting for your next essay!!!

  1. Essay topic-Science and Religion– Are they compatible?

    Science is defined as the systematic study of the different components and features of the physical and natural world, based on experiment, observations and inferences. Religion in its ancient and pure form is defined as belief in and worship of the natural powers of the physical world. Based on the definition of the two it can be inferred that that in totality they deal with the same subject of natural and physical world, though the methodology and therefore the inferences differ in each case. This difference in inferences that are drawn has given rise to the never ending debate of the compatibility between science and religion.

    Science and religion both have been implicitly involved with the mankind ever since the evolution (as science says it) or arrival (as religion calls it) of the first human being on the face of this planet. As soon as the human beings began their residence on the planet, they became aware of their surroundings using their cognitive abilities and started experimenting with everything they came across and based on the outcomes of their experiments they drew inferences about the viability and safety of the concerned object. On the same time there were certain forces which were beyond their comprehension but were a part of their environment. Since these forces were beyond their control and understanding, they started fearing them and eventually worshiping them, for they thought this would save them from the wrath of these superior forces by pleasing the forces. Thus, though implicit and dormant initially yet science and religion both have been co-existent and have guided development of the humans.

    Though both science and religion have been co-existent, but not without their shares of mutual confrontations. With the passage of time and development of the cognitive abilities of the human race, the understanding about science and religion gradually started becoming more explicit and well defined. The developments of the distinctions between the two caused many moral and ideological confrontations in almost every part of the world as many rudimentary beliefs and principles were challenged. Galileo’s discoveries of heliocentricism challenged the centuries old belief of earth being the centre of the universe and caused a huge furore in church and even led to his execution. Many such instances happened around different parts of the world, where new developments in science challenged and successfully changed many religious faiths and beliefs.

    These confrontations however subdued in the post renaissance period as reliance on empirical study of sciences increased and religion became more humanistic in approach. These changes in the nature of science and religion were not isolated, in fact were inter related and were caused due to the contemporary developments in both the fields. Developments in science such as invention of printing and books helped in spread of liberal philosophies and caused democratisation of the society thereby leading to developments of more humanistic principles in religious approaches. Similarly the abolition of old and rigid customs which were associated with religion gave the men more time and space to indulge in scientific endeavours and hence led to development of science. This trend of interconnectedness and mutual developments has continued ever since with both religion and science influencing each other.

    As time has progressed myriad developments have taken place in science which have led to comprehensive understanding of various natural phenomenon and in turn have impacted religious philosophies in a constructive manner and have also helped man in comprehending his religion in a more rational and holistic manner. These developments which have occurred on the timescale of this planet have established a sound and deep relation between science and religion. Both are mutually co-existent and serve as guiding forces for their respective existence and development.

    In the present global scenario when religious ideologies are being tweaked and propagated by organisations and individuals having vested interests, and scientific inventions and discoveries are being put more to use for destructive purposes rather than for constructive and developmental ones, we need to go back to the basic philosophies of peace, harmony and mutual co-existence which all the religions propagate and should intertwine these philosophies with the approaches of science. This would lead to peaceful and developmental use of science and would better and prolong the existence of humans on this planet which we call our home.

    • Hi! Thanks for your interest in us. Now coming to your essay-
      #The introduction of the essay could have been better. It looks like an introduction to a GS answer.
      # Both the content and your style of writing are good.
      # Historical evolution of the concept is good.
      # Conclusion is better.
      Suggestion: If you gave some examples related to the compatibility of science and religion in the context of India, it would have been better.
      Keep writing! You have the potential to fetch high marks in essay. Wish you good luck! 🙂

  2. Essay topic-Economic insecurity is the root cause of social crimes.

    Since the advent of modern civilisations till present day, availability of money has been linked with prosperity and happiness. Though, many philosophers would not agree with above inference, but it is a truth of our times, and more so of the present global discourse. The economic stability of a country is a sign of prosperity of its society. It is well known that individuals make families, families in turn combine to make societies and societies come together to culminate into a nation state. Thus, the well being of an individual citizen is indirectly but ultimately related to well being and stability of the nation.

    For the well being of a citizen, there are certain prerequisites. A country must guarantee some basic rights and securities to its citizens in order to ensure a decent standard of life to them. Economic
    security is one of the most important rights required by the citizens. Economic security refers to the availability of sufficient monetary resources at one’s disposal which are required for fulfilling the basic necessities of human life. These basic necessities comprise of a clean residence, food, basic sanitation facilities, health and primary education. These are the most basic facilities required for leading a humane life, and for availing and maintaining these facilities, economic sustainability on part of citizens is required.

    With the significant developments in medical sciences the longevity of human life has increased. This has led to burgeoning of human population which has tremendously increased the pressure on the national governments in terms of providing the basic necessities to its citizens. Most of the developing and even few of the developed countries have failed to provide the basic services to all its citizens. The rates of growth of economic resources of governments have not been able to match pace with the growth rate of population and thereby the countries have either failed in generating the
    required number of facilities or in delivering the services to its citizens. In the post globalisation era, significant developments in ICT has increased flow and availability of information thereby making the common citizenry more aware of its rights and consequently it has increased the pressure on the government to deliver the basic services adequately, effectively and efficiently. This mismatch in the demand and supply of services creates antagonistic feelings in citizens with regard to their government.

    Economic insecurity and social instability are mutually reinforcing. Presence of one leads to initiation and propagation of the other. The lack of education due to insufficient education infrastructure is a major cause of widespread illiteracy in developing countries like India. This illiteracy in turn prevents the citizens from becoming sufficiently skilled and taking up employment opportunities. Inability to take up employment causes lack of income generation and consequently economic insecurity. Due to lack of regular employment the illiterate citizens take to the path of crime for income generation and financial stability. Similarly lack of health and sanitation facilities due to lack of health infrastructure leads to diseases and the high cost of medical expenditure causes misery and distress to the poor citizenry and in turn pushes them on the path of crime and injustice. These suffering citizens often become victims of blood and organ trading rackets in order to earn some money for their survival. A similar case can be put up for lack of other basic facilities like food, place to reside and so on. The lack of economic security and employment on part of citizens leads to insufficient tax resources for the country, lack of manpower and thus shortfalls in production of goods and services in the economy. Lack of health, sanitation and food leads to stunting and improper growth, thereby deteriorating the quality and quantity of the demographic dividend. This mentally and physically deteriorated population sometimes takes up arms in rebellion to the nation and for venting out their frustration against the dismal socio-economic factors. The lack of equitable development and inadequate distribution of resources of states amongst its citizens has been one of the
    major reasons for rise of naxalism and secessionism in parts of our country.

    The makers of our constitution were aware of the necessary requirement of economic justice along with the social and political justice. This awareness has found expression in the preamble which declares provision of economic justice as one of its objectives. The need of economic development and its consequential relation with social development was re-emphasised with the inclusion of Directive principles of State policy in the constitution. These DPSP’s serve as guidelines for the state to formulate and implement policies which ensure economic and social development of the country. During the period of 68 years, from gaining independence to up to present day a lot of government programmes and policies have been and implemented keeping in mind the above
    mentioned constitutional objectives. The problem has been with the effective and efficient implementation of these policies. These shortcomings in implementation have in turn been caused by either lack of adequate economic resources or by their non judicious use. The inability of the country to achieve the MDG’s of reducing hunger levels, increasing the share of women in wage employment and in reducing maternal mortality rates, sheds light on the inequitable distribution of economic resources which leads to sustained underdevelopment of social indices.

    Even after 68 years of independence a lot needs to be done on the part of achieving equitable economic development. The peculiar case in India has been that the country can boast about having numerous millionaires and at the same time feel sorry about housing one of the largest number of poor and hungry of the world. This presence of extremes, poorness and hunger has been a major factor impeding the holistic development of the country. Hunger and death has caused huge anguish to the one’s suffering from it and they have been left with almost no options other than taking to the path of crime in order to achieve what should have been rightfully theirs.

    • Hello DSR

      1.You did a multidimensional analysis (polity, social, etc) , brought on current affairs also (MDG etc) that’s good keep it up.

      2. Your ideas are good but arrange them properly
      Ex: 4th line onwards 2nd para looks like an apt intro to the topic

      3. You have vast knowledge but please dont pour it all at one go. It restricts the flow of essay. Moreover, to give all ideas you switch them very frequently which makes essay just a collection of ideas with no proper explanation.

      4. More dimensions can be added in analysis

      Overall ideas are gud, keep writing & you can score very good marks

      • Thanks a lot for your feedback Sir/Ma’am. The two essays I have posted here are my very first attempts at essay writing after school i.e after 08 years. I would definitely work on the feedback and will try to come up with better essays in future. Thanks again for your time and efforts 🙂

  3. ” मुझे हिंसा पर आपत्ति है ; जब
    यह अच्छा करती हुई प्रतीत होती है, अच्छाई केवल अस्थायी है, इसके
    द्वारा की गयी बुराई स्थायी है। ”

    प्रकृति सर्वत्र विषमताओं से भरी पड़ी है दार्शनिकों के दर्शन,
    साहित्यकारों की रचनाओं, मानव के परिवेश से लेकर प्रकृति के स्वयं के स्वरूप में
    भी विषमता का ही स्पंदन होता है | इसी विषमता के आधार तथा मानवीय संवेगों की चेतना
    के कारण समय के साथ मानव का अपनी परम्पराओं को दूसरों पर थोपने का प्रयास तो कभी
    अपनी विचारधारा की मिथ्या प्रवंचना या कभी शक्ति का लोभ उसे हिंसा के मार्ग की और
    धकेलता आया है, हिंसा का मार्ग कभी कभी बहुत स्वाभाविक तथा आसन भी लगता है क्यूंकि
    इसमें विवेक अक्सर कहीं खो जाता है और पूरी गुंजाइश होती है की अन्य मानवीय गुण भी
    लुप्त हो जाएँ |

    हिंसा के मार्ग की पैरवी
    करने वालों की लम्बी फेहरिस्त रही है | इतिहास हिंसा के रक्त रंजित पन्नों से भरा
    पड़ा है तो हमें हिंसा के परिमाणों पर विचार करते हुए इसकी प्रासंगिकता पर ज़रूर
    विचार करना चाहिए |

    हिंसा कई बार अवश्यम्भावी
    लगती है यह कई बार प्रतिकार के रूप में भी सामने आती है | राम-रावण, कौरव-पांडव से
    लेकर आधुनिक युद्धों तक कई बार हमें एक पक्ष की न्यायप्रियता को लेकर आश्वस्ति का
    भाव आता है और प्रतीत होता है की धर्म की रक्षार्थ हिंसा अनिवार्य है किन्तु हिंसा
    के परिणाम सदैव निरपेक्ष होते हैं | चाहे युद्ध कितने भी बड़े प्रयोजन को लेकर लड़ा
    गया हो |

    हिंसा के लाभ अक्सर
    तात्कालिक होते हैं | इसके लाभों में सबसे मुखर है – तात्कालिक शान्ति | दूसरे
    पक्ष की तात्कालिक शक्तिहीनता ही तात्कालिक शान्ति का मार्ग भी प्रशस्त करती है |
    जैसा की प्रथम विश्व युद्ध के बाद का जर्मनी का उदाहरण है | हिंसा के बाद कई बार
    हमें दुर्दांत शासन या प्रतिद्वंदी से मुक्ति भी मिल जाती है | रूस की क्रान्ति के
    बाद ज़ारशाही का पतन ऐसा ही उदाहरण है | हमारा समकालीन इतिहास ऐसे उदाहरणों से पटा
    पड़ा है – लीबिया युद्ध, सद्दाम पतन, मिश्र क्रान्ति |

    युद्ध अपने साथ इतनी
    विभीषिका लाता है की तात्कालिक रूप से मानव हिंसा से घृणा करने लगता है | यह मसला
    मनुष्य की मनोवृत्ति से जुड़ा हुआ भी है | अक्सर आम जीवन में भी हिंसा से भरे अखबार
    के पन्ने पलटते हुए हम क्षण भर के लिए विषाद से भर उठते हैं | तात्कालिक रूप से
    हिंसा से कोई एक पक्ष तो लाभान्वित होता ही है, चाहे हिंसा किसी भी रूप में हो |
    विश्व युद्ध के समय भी कई देशों की अर्थ व्यवस्थाएं कुलांचें भरने लगी थी | हिंसा
    कई बार नवाचार का मार्ग प्रशस्त करती है जैसा द्वितीय विश्व युद्ध के समय हुआ |
    हिंसा के बाद विजयी पक्ष को कुछ समय के लिए अपने पौरुष का दंभ होने लगता है | इस
    प्रकार हिंसा के कुछ सकारात्मक पक्ष दिखाई पड़ते हैं किन्तु सिर्फ सतही द्रष्टि से
    देखने वालों को ही ये नज़र आते हैं थोड़ी सी गहरी द्रष्टि डालने पर साफ़ द्रष्टिगत
    होता है की उक्त परिणाम सिर्फ तात्कालिक हैं, सिर्फ नवाचार से सम्बद्ध खोजों को
    छोड़कर किन्तु यह भी महज एक संयोग है वरना नवाचार का हिंसा से कोई सम्बन्ध नहीं है
    | अतः स्पष्ट है की हिंसा के अगर कुछ लाभ दीखते भी हैं तो सिर्फ तात्कालिक हैं |

    अब इसके नकारात्माक
    परिणामों पर विचार करते हुए इसकी कालावधि और परिणाम पर विचार करते हैं | हिंसा के
    बाद जो सबसे स्वाभाविक परिणाम होता है वह है- प्रतिहिंसा | हर हिंसा अपना
    प्रत्युत्तर प्रतिहिंसा से देती है और वह भी अपने ज्यादा दुर्दांत रूप में | प्रथम
    विश्व युद्ध की प्रतिक्रिया द्वितीय विश्व युद्ध, इराक युद्ध का परिणाम ISIS | कई
    बार तो इससे हिंसा का एक आवर्ती चक्र कायम हो जाता है | जो की किसी भी रूप में
    अच्छा नहीं कहा जा सकता है | हिंसा में हम अपने ज़रूरी संसाधनों का अपव्यय कर देते
    हैं कई बार हिंसा सिर्फ आवेगों का परिणाम मात्र होती है परन्तु उसके परिणाम चिर
    काल तक्रहते हैं | क्षण भर में ही हिरोशिमा नागासाकी जैसे हंसते खेलते शहर विनाश
    की धुल में समाहित हो गए | यह एक ऐसी विनाश लीला थी जिसने पूरे विश्व को झकझोर
    दिया और जापान की स्वयं की नीतियाँ सदैव के लिए बदल गयी | हिंसा में संसाधनों का
    प्रभूत पैमाने पर अपव्यय होता है | जो खर्चा देशों को अपने नागरिकों की शिक्षा,
    स्वास्थ्य पर करना चाहिए वह खर्च रक्षा सम्बन्धी अपव्यय पर करने लगते हैं | यह महज
    संयोग नहीं है की जो क्षेत्र युद्ध और हिंसा में उलझे हुए हैं वे ही देश गरीबी और
    अन्य मानवीय वंचनाओं से भी ग्रसित देश हैं | विडम्बना है की वर्तमान वैश्विक
    स्वास्थ्य बजट अपने रक्षा बजट का महज 1 फ़ीसदी है |

    हिंसा मानवीय विवेक को
    घुन लगा देता है | हिंसा पर उतारू मनुष्य स्वयं की हानि पर भी अपने प्रतिद्वंदी की
    हानि पर आमादा रहता है | वर्ना विवेकशील स्तर पर हिंसा का कोई कारण ही नहीं बनता
    है | हिंसा का सबसे ज्यादा शिकार वे होते हैं जो कमज़ोर और वंचित वर्ग के होते हैं,
    भले ही हिंसा से उनका कोई सरोकार न हो | हिंसा से पीड़ित व्यक्ति के बच्चों और
    घरवालों को भी एक बड़ी कीमत चुकानी पड़ती है | हिंसा से ग्रस्त बालकों पर इसके
    अप्रतिम प्रभाव पड़ते हैं, उनकी मनोवृत्ति सादा के लिए घृणा से भर उठाती है | घृणा
    से भरे बचपन की कीमत पूरे समाज को चुकानी पड़ती है | युद्ध के बाद पीड़ित व शोक
    संसप्त परिवारों की लड़ाई भी कोई युद्ध से कम नहीं होती है | बस वह एक अलग ही
    मोर्चे पर लड़ी जाती है- संवेदनाओं के मोर्चे पर |

    हिंसा की वेदी पर
    सबसे पहले जिसकी बलि चढ़ती है वह है- मानवता |मानव अपनी सारी संवेदनाओं मानवोचित
    गुणों को ताक पर रख देता है और बाद में अनंत काल के लिए उस पर पश्चाताप करता है,
    क्यूंकि किसी भी स्तर पर हो या किसी भी रूप में हो हिंसा के परिणामों से कोई भी
    पक्ष विमुख नहीं हो सकता | संततियों तक को उसके परिणाम भुगतने पड़ते हैं |

    हिंसा के परिणामों की
    भयावहता तथा परिणामात्मक के कारण ही सभी धर्म, महापुरुष हिंसा के प्रति निषेध रखते
    आये हैं | बुद्ध ने तो कहा भी है असली विजय वही विजय है जिसमे कोई पराजित नहीं
    होता | बुद्ध का यहाँ यही आशय है की यदि कोई भी पराजित होता है तो वह एक नयी
    प्रतिद्वंदिता को जन्म देता है | स्पष्ट है की धर्म की यह बात मनोवैज्ञानिक स्तर
    पर कही गयी है | गाँधी ने तो हिंसा को मन और वचन के स्तर पर भी निषेध किया है
    क्यूंकि हिंसा के प्रारम्भिक स्रोत वैचारिक स्तर पर ही होते हैं | इनके परिणामों
    के बारे में निरंकुश तानाशाह स्टालिन का यह कथन प्रासंगिक है- एक व्यक्ति की
    मृत्यु दुःख का विषय है परन्तु एक लाख लोगों का मरना एक आंकड़ा है | स्पष्ट है की
    हिंसा में सबे पहले सबसे बड़े परिमाण पर मानवता मरती है | जिसका कोई मूल्य नहीं है
    |

    • मनीष जी हमारे इस प्रयास में अपनी रूचि दिखने के लिए धन्यवाद |
      # आपका निबंध काफी अच्छा है |
      # आपके शब्दों की पकड़ बेहद अच्छी है |
      # विचारो को युक्ति संगत और प्रभावी ढंग से रखा है आपने |
      आप इन बातो पे गौर कर सकते है :
      # बहु आयात्मक विश्लेषण की जरुरत है |
      # एक पंक्ति में एक से ज्यादा उद्धरण , कथन को कम प्रभावी बनाते है |
      मेहनत करते रहिये आप बहुत अच्छे अंक प्राप्त कर सकते है |

    • Thanks killer_queen!
      1.The flow of your writing is good.
      2. Your thoughts are clearly expressed.
      3. Use of quotations in between adds to the beauty of your essay.
      4. However, the pages of the essay are not chronologically arranged. Take a little care while uploading them 🙂

      Suggestions from our side:
      1. The nuclear strike by US on Japan should not be glorified. Attacking another nation should not be quoted as a symbol of strength.
      2. You can also quote example of Darwin’s theory of natural selection and survival of the fittest as an example of how strength gets favoured by nature too.
      3. Rest seems good. Keep practising for further improvement. Your marks for this essay will be in the range 60-65.

  4. Admin dada,

    Good Fences Make Good Neighbors

    यदि मानव के संक्षिप्त इतिहासवृत पर द्रष्टिपात करें तो यह स्पष्ट हो जाता है की औद्योगिक क्रान्ति के पूर्व तक देशों की सीमाएं परिवर्तित होती रहती थी | लोगों का ध्यान ह्रदय क्षेत्र की तरफ रहता था और सीमाओं का आपेक्षिक महत्त्व कम था, किन्तु धीरे धीरे औद्योगिक क्रान्ति और औपनिवेशीकरण का युग आया तो साम्राजवादी देशों को अपने उपनिवेशों की सुरक्षा हेतु सीमांकन आवश्यक लगा | बाद के काल में संसाधनों के प्रति जागरूकता में वृद्धि हुई तो सीमाएं अत्यधिक महत्वपूर्ण और संवेदनशील हो गई | सीमाएं किन्ही दो देशों के मध्य सेतु का कार्य करती हैं तो क्या अच्छे संबंधों के मूल में सुरक्षित बाडबंदी की हुई सीमा आवश्यक है या यह स्वच्छंद वैचारिक और सांस्कृतिक प्रवाह में अवरोध का कार्य करती है | इन्हीं के आलोक में, देशों के मध्य परस्पर संबंधों की व्याख्या सीमाओं के सन्दर्भ में करने का प्रयास करते हैं |
    सर्वप्रथम सीमाएं किस प्रकार संबंधों में अवरोध का कार्य करती है, इस पर विचार करते हैं | सीमाएं भौतिक अवरोध का कार्य करती है किन्तु जब किसी देश में सामजिक तनाव बढ़ जाते हैं तो सीमाएं कितनी भी मजबूत हों वे अप्रतिम मानवीय दबाव को झेल नहीं पाती | इसी कारण प्रवसन की समस्या उत्पन्न होती है | सीमाएं इनके मानवीय पहलू को नेपथ्य में डाल देती हैं | चाहे वह म्यांमार से प्रवासित हो रहे रोहिंग्या मुस्लिमों की समस्या हो या अफगान हजारा की या उत्तरी अफ्रीका से द. यूरोप की तरफ प्रवासन कर रहे लोगों की समस्या हो या ऑस्ट्रेलिया की राजनीति में चर्चित रहे ‘बोट पीपुल’ की समस्या हो | यहाँ यह तथ्य रेखांकित करना होगा की जहां सीमाएं इस समस्या के समाधान में असफल रही हैं, वहीँ इससे सम्बंधित देशों के मध्य दुराव बढे हैं | वर्तमान में आसियान देशों के मध्य तनावपूर्ण संबंधों का सबसे प्रमुख कारण रोहिंग्या लोगों की समस्या से निपटने में इनकी अक्षमता रही है | आसियान देशों के संबंधों के स्वर्णिम अध्याय में यह यह काले धब्बे के समान है | इसी प्रकार की समस्या के कारण यूरोपीय यूनियन के देशों के मध्य कटुता की खबरें सुर्ख़ियों में रही हैं |
    सीमाएं सिर्फ भौतिक अवरोध होती हैं यह स्वच्छंद सांस्कृतिक और वैचारिक प्रवाह को बाधित करती है क्यूंकि अक्सर दो देशों के मध्य सीमा पार के लोगों के मध्य सांस्कृतिक सम्बन्ध काफी घनिष्ठ पाए जाते हैं | बंगाल-बांग्लादेश, उत्तर पूर्वी राज्य-म्यांमार, पकिस्तान-अफगानिस्तान और इन सबसे आगे US तथा पश्चिमी यूरोप के मध्य सांस्कृतिक संबंधों के ही कारण तो इनके संबंधों को अतलांतिक की गहराई भी विच्छेदित नहीं कर पाती |
    वर्तमान में जब सुचना क्रान्ति का दौर चल रहा है | सूचनाएं तीव्र गति से आ रही हैं | परिस्थतियाँ तेज़ी से बदल रही हैं | साइबर अपराध बढ़ रहे हैं | वैश्विकरण के दौर में जब व्यापार में WTO जैसी संस्थाओं की महत्ता बढ़ रही है तो सीमाओं की उपादेयता कम हो रही है | यूरोपीय यूनियन इसका सबसे अच्छा उदाहरण है जहां वे अंतर्राष्ट्रीय मंच पर अपनी सीमाओं को भुलाकर एक मजबूत पक्ष के रूप में अपनी बात रखते हैं धीर धीरे यही भावना अफ़्रीकी देशों में भी बलवती हो रही है |
    सीमाएं यदि सुरक्षा और अच्छे पडोसी की गारंटी होती तो क्रीमिया विवाद इतना प्रचंड कभी नहीं होता | इसके मूल में यही है की पूर्वी यूरोप के लोगों ने उस भौतिक अवरोध को दिल से कभी नहीं स्वीकार किया | यहाँ गांधीजी की पंक्तियाँ उधत करना समीचीन होगा | विभाजन की त्रासदी के सन्दर्भ में उन्होने कहा था – “यह सिर्फ भौतिक अवरोध है और लोग विभाजन को दिल से इसे कभी न स्वीकारें” | इसी बात को और आगे ले जाते हुए हमारे पूर्व प्रधान मंत्री ने भारत-पाक संबंधों की दिशा में महत्वपूर्ण बात कही – “आओ हम सीमाओं को ही महत्वहीन बना दें, ताकि कम से कम LOC पर तो लोगों का आवागमन स्वच्छंद हो सके” |
    किन्तु इतने मजबूत पक्षों के बावजूद सीमाओं की उपादेयता को नज़र अंदाज नहीं किया जा सकता | यह देशों को सुरक्षा का भाव तो देता ही है | इसी कारण पाक से लोगों के गैर कानूनी प्रवासन की खबरें नहीं सुनाई देती किन्तु बांग्लादेश के सन्दर्भ में तो यह एक बड़ा मुद्दा है इस समस्या का एक प्रमुख कारण यह भी है की भारत-बांग्लादेश सीमाबंदी का पूर्ण न होना और काफी जटिल भौगोलिक सरंचना का होना | भारत जैसे देश जो शंकित पड़ोसियों से घिरे हैं उनके लिए सीमाओं की महत्ता और बढ़ जाती है | वर्तमान में आतंकवाद के साए में सीमाओं की चौकसी और उचित सीमाबंदी एक बहुत ही महत्वपूर्ण विषयवस्तु है | हाल में भारत-नेपाल सीमा पर दो भिन्न घटनाक्रमों में दो दुर्दांत आतंकवादियों के पकडे जाने से सीमा रुपी अवरोधों की उपादेयता और बढ़ गयी है |
    भारत चीन समस्या के मूल में सीमा की समस्या ही है क्यूंकि हम मेक मोहन रेखा पर इसकी ऐतिहासिकता की वजह से एकमत नहीं हो पा रहे हैं किन्तु यहाँ यह बात उल्लेखनीय है की चीन-म्यांमार ने अपने सीमा विवादों को मेक मोहन रेखा के ही आलोक में सुलझाया है तो यह बात भारत चीन विवाद के समाधान में मेक मोहन रेखा के महत्त्व को और इसके समाधान के मार्ग को प्रशस्त करती है |
    US तथा कनाडा के सीमा संबंधों को अक्सर एक श्रेष्ठ उदाहरण के तौर पर पेश किया जाता है किन्तु यहाँ मुख्य तथ्य यह है की दोनों देशों के बीच सौहार्द्रपूर्ण सम्बन्ध हैं सामाजिक, सांस्कृतिक और विकास की समानता जैसे मुद्दे उनकी सीमाओं को सुरक्षित और स्वछंद बनाते हैं | इसके विपरीत US मेक्सिको सीमा तो US में गैर कानूनी तरीके से घुसने का मार्ग बन चुकी है | स्पष्ट है की सीमाओं की स्वछंदता में दोनों देशों की जिम्मेदारी बराबर होती है जिसमें अन्य शक्तियां भी कार्य करती हैं |
    वर्तमान में जब संसाधनों की होड़ मची हुई है | विभिन्न राष्ट्र अधिकाधिक संसाधनों पर नियंत्रण चाहते हैं तो सीमाओं की उपादेयता स्वतः ही बढ़ जाती है अन्यथा दोनों देशों के संबंधों में दुराव उत्पन्न होते हैं | दक्षिण चीन सागर की समस्या का मूल, संसाधनों के नियंत्रण को लेकर ही है | इसी कारण चीन की उस क्षेत्र के सभी पडोसी देशों से कटुता है | जापान और द. कोरिया के संबंधों में भी दुराव का कारण यही है | भारत पाक के बीच सर क्रीक का मुद्दा भी इसी कारण गरमाया रहता है | यदि सीमाओं का उचित सीमांकन होता तो ये समस्या कभी उत्पन्न नहीं होती | इन सब पक्षों के अलावा इस तथ्य का उल्लेख करना आवश्यक है की सुरक्षित सीमाओं के अभाव में अस्थिर देश अपने पडोसी देशों के लिए भी समस्या उत्पन्न करता है | एक अस्थिर पकिस्तान या अफगानिस्तान पूरे क्षेत्र के लिए एक समस्या बन सकता है | उ. कोरिया जैसे राष्ट्र जिन्हें अक्सर ‘ब्लैक होल’ स्टेट कहा जाता है, ऐसे देशों के साथ संबंधों में सुरक्षित सीमाएं काफिर महत्वपूर्ण होती हैं |
    इस प्रकार हम इस निष्कर्ष पर पहुँच सकते हैं की सुरक्षित सीमाएं अच्छे पडोसी की गारंटी नहीं होती किन्तु इससे सुरक्षा संबंधी मुद्दों के सम्बन्ध में उनकी प्रमुखता कम नहीं हो जाती | वैसे हमारा अंतिम लक्ष्य सीमाओं को महत्वहीन बनाना ही होना चाहिए और सारी नीतियों और कूटनीतिक बातचीतों के मूल में यही रहना चाहिए | जैसा की भूतपूर्व अमरीकी राष्ट्रपति जॉन एफ केनेडी ने कहा है –“भूगोल ने हमें पडोसी, इतिहास ने मित्र, अर्थशास्त्र ने भागीदार तथा आवश्यकता ने सहयोगी बनाया है | जिन्हें भगवान् ने ही इस प्रकार जोड़ा है उनको मनुष्य कैसे अलग कर पायेगा” |

    • मनीष जी ,
      भाषा पे आपकी बहुत अच्छी पकड़ है |
      आपने तःथ्य बहुत अच्छे से प्रस्तुत किये है |
      हमारी तरफ से सुझाव :

      ऐसा लग रहा है आप विषय से भटक गए है |
      आपने बहु आयत्मक विवेचना नहीं की सिर्फ देश तक सिमित रह गए इससे आप दो इंसानो के बीच की सीमाये या दो राज्यों के बीच की सीमाओ पे भी ले जा सकते थे
      हो सके तो अगली बार आप कागज़ पे लिख पर फोटो अपलोड करे, ताकि टाइपिंग की गलतियां जैसे : “यह सिर्फ भौतिक अवरोध है और लोग विभाजन को दिल से इसे कभी न स्वीकारें”, नहीं होगी

  5. मनीष जी
    आपके शब्दों की पकड़ हर बार की तरह इस बार भी बेहद अच्छी है |
    आपके निबंध में एक निरन्तरता रहती है, जो पाठक को बाँध के रखती है ,यह बहुत अच्छी बात है |
    आपने तथ्य का अच्छा प्रयोग किया है |

    कुछ सुझाव :

    हालांकि आपने बहुत सारे विषयो को छुआ है ,पर बहु आयात्मक विवेचना की थोड़ी और जरुरत है |
    ” चीन के एक बालक नीति ” की जगह ” एक संतान नीति ” लिखेंगे तो ज्यादा अच्छा लगेगा |
    जैसा आपने खुद ही लिखा है लेखनी में थोड़े से सुधार की जरुरत है |
    आप प्रयत्न करते रहिये, आपमें अच्छे अंक लाने की पूर्ण क्षमता है |

  6. Admin …Please review.

    Topic-In India context, both human intelligence and technical intelligence are crucial in combating terrorism.

    • Hi Synchronicity! You have well written the essay. The content of the essay is good. However, the introduction could have been better. It seems to be an abrupt beginning. Also, you could have expanded the horizon of the topic rather than restricting it to Indian context only. One more thing, focus a little bit on sentence formation. Some of the sentences in the essay are not well framed and words are used here and there with no proper connection or link. Say for eg. ‘Accountability regulatory agency is required’. The paragraph doesn’t speak about the need to make the system more accountable.
      Rest all are good. You have great ideas so with little bit of practice you can score good marks. Good luck! 🙂

      • saying thank you , thank you again again might reduce or won’t convey what I want to….maybe. but really THANK YOU SO MUCH for reading the essay n evaluating it. I agree with every word of you wrote.I guess I explain n understand everything in my mind only,leaving nothing or just keywords for the reader:)..I will be writing an essay soon keeping all ur feedback in my mind,will post it.hope it will be better this time.thank you.take care.Have a beautiful day!

    • Hi Synchronicity! Your essay is rich in content. Your ideas are innovative and you’ve tried to bring about a multi dimensional analysis. The examples you quoted establish a good link between science and mysticism.
      However, I suggest you to focus a little more on sentence formation. It would help improve your grades.
      The marks for this essay would be in the range 50-55.

      • Thank you admin for the evaluation. I do agree & feel the lack when I read my essay after few days.
        Can you please show me how to improve my sentence formation with an example, I will be indebted. I trying to find the best way to improve it through some tips available online. if you have any tips or any article on ur website for that.please guide me.Thanks a lot…. again!!

        • We will soon come up with such an article. Till then just keep practicing by writing smaller sentences. Ex: ” I trying to ” would look better if written as “I am searching online some best ways to improve it. “

        • We’ll soon come up with such an article. Till then try reading some essays online. You’ll develop an insight as to how to form short meaningful sentences. For eg. In your above comment you wrote ‘I trying to’. This can be written as ‘I’m looking for some articles online to help me improve my skills further.’

  7. Sir,
    Requesting you to evaluate
    Topic:- Is scientific temper opposed to superstition or can it cohabit easily with superstition?
    Medium:- Hindi

  8. मनीष जी
    आप बहुत अच्छा लिखते है |
    आपके लेखन में बांधे रखने की क्षमता है |
    परन्तु आपका लेख मूल विषय से भटक जाता है | उदाहरण के तोर पर : इस निबंध में आपने ” संगत ” पर उतना ज़ोर दिए ही नहीं, जो आपको देना चाहिए था |
    अंत बड़ा अधूरा सा लग रहा है |

    थोड़ा सा अपनी लेखनी को और बेहतर बनाये , आप बहुत अच्छे अंक प्राप्त कर सकते है |

  9. admin जी,
    Requesting you to review my essay.
    thanks sir,
    क्या प्रतिस्पर्धा का बढ़ता स्तर युवाओं के हित में है

    • मनीष जी हर बार की तरह आपके निबंध ने अंत तक बांधे रखा |
      परन्तु इस बार भी आप विषय से भटक गए |
      कुछ आयाम और जोड़े जा सकते थे जैसे की आपने प्रतिस्पर्धा के बारे में सीधे कॉलेज से ही लिखा स्कूल से शुरू होने वाले प्रतिस्पर्धा का क्या ?
      आप शब्दों का चयन बहुत अच्छा करते है |
      ऐसे ही लिखते रहिये आप मुख्ये परीक्षा में अच्छा प्रदर्शन कर पाएंगे |

      • शुक्रिया आपके सुझाव के लिए
        बेहतरी का प्रयास करता रहूगा

    • Hello Utkarsh first of all apologies for the late response, due to some technical issues this happened.
      Coming to your essay
      You have put enormous efforts in making the essay wholesome, you tried bringing the historical dimensions as well, but it actually became messy. In first para only you made it clear that you will criticize PPP model what we think is that’s too early to reveal. In later half it started looking like an average GS answer.
      You missed a lot many things ex: 4-P project announced in budget, social auditing concept etc. Overall it was a good try but you can do much better than this.

      • Hello spirit breaker, you are well versed with the current affairs & even have a good knowledge of quotes, do use them wisely they will help you a lot in scoring well.
        Suggestions :
        Barring a few lines your essay is not at all in sync with the topic.Your discussion hovered around the recent incidents which disturbed social fabric, but you have not linked them to growth & progress.Moreover, we found your suggestions a bit extreme, so please tone them down to a practical level. We think its your first try at essay, you will improve with time, keep writing. All d best

    • Hello Meenakshi, it was a nice attempt. You tried to bring very many dimensions in the essay.
      Suggestions from our side are :

      Intro needs a little more workout, this is what draws examiner’s attention, your mere re phrasal of topic won’t do that work.
      The sentence formation need a little work.
      If you quote statistics in your arguments it will look more convincing, (Ex. nearly 74 % of India is literate now as compared to nearly 12% in 1947 ).
      You gave a subtle hint of Forest Right Act, its good, but will look nice, if you can quote such initiatives by name.
      Plz do not write beyond the margins in examination, it will leave a bad impression.
      Keep writing , All the best 🙂

  10. प्रणाम सर,
    विषय- पर्यटन: क्या भारत के लिए अगला बड़ा प्रेरक हो सकता है (Tourism: Can this be the next big thing for India)
    आपके अमूल्य सुझावों से प्रार्थी को अनुग्रहित करें

    • मनीष जी नमस्कार, आप लेखनी के धनि है | आपके लेखन में एक निरंतरता है, जिससे की बस पढ़ते चले जाते है |
      इसमें आपने जगह जगह आँकड़ो का बहुत अच्छा प्रयोग किया है | बस हर बार की तरह इस बार भी बीच में आप मूल विषय से थोड़ा सा भटक गए, तब इस लेख का विषय भारत की सुंदरता ज्यादा प्रतीत हो रहा था | इस पहलु पे थोड़ा सा गौर कीजिये, आप मुख्य परीक्षा में और बेहतर प्रदर्शन कर पाएंगे | थोड़े आयाम और जोड़े जा सकते थे, पर एक बहुत उम्दा प्रयास किया आपने | एक अनुरोध आपसे, अगर आपको हमारी यह पहल अच्छी लगी हो तो बाकी लोगो को तक भी इससे पहुचने का प्रयास करे, धन्यवाद |

      • शुक्रिया जी, और बेहतरी का प्रयास करूँगा,
        आपका प्रयास बेहतरीन है , हिंदी माध्यम वालों के लिए तो विशेषकर जिनको निबंध के अच्छे फीडबैक बमुश्किल मिल पाते हैं, आपकी पहल को मैं अवश्य लोगों तक पहुचाऊंगा
        पुनः धन्यवाद

      • Very sorry. Plz check it now. I have written page numbers. Sorry for the inconvinience

        Plz review now. Uploaded in order with page number.
        TIA

        • Hello spirit breaker, your knowledge on civil society issue is very good, but the essay was on its role in Good Governance (GG) & Strengthening Democracy.
          Suggestions:
          The keywords of GG : transparency, accountability were not highlighted properly, no mention of social audit at all.
          The intro seems to be a bit out of tune,you started with a question that too not directly relating to the topic, on deep thinking one can connect welfare state & democracy-GG, but in opening it sounds completely out of sync with topic.
          Justify your arguments properly, Ex: civil society organizes various competition in local languages was a good point if explained properly.
          You can write very well, just do a little bit research on the actual demand of essay & arrange thoughts properly before writing.
          Sorry for a little bit harsh tone, but this honest advice can improve you marks.

  11. विषय- पर्यटन: क्या भारत के लिए अगला बड़ा प्रेरक हो सकता है (Tourism: Can this be the next big thing for India)

    आपके कीमती सुझाव की आशा में ।

    • नवीन जी, आपकी खूबी यह है की आप सही समय पर सही शब्द प्रयुक्त करना जानते है | आप करंट अफेयर्स से भली भाति परिचित है, जो आपको निबंध में बहुत अच्छे अंक दिलवा सकता है | आपने बहुत सारे आयाम को छुआ है, और उनमे नए पहलुओं को उजागर किया है (उदहारण: उत्तराखंड त्राश्दी का पर्यटन पर असर ) |

      हमारे सुझाव :
      आपके निबंध में निरंतरता की कमी है, यह अलग अलग विषय पे लिखे हुए खंड प्रतीत होते है |
      आप अपने ज्ञान को एक सार्थक क्रम में जमाये आपके अंको में बहुत सुधार होगा |
      कुछ चीज़े मूल विषय से काफी भटक गयी है, हर अनुछेद में ऐसा लगता है की निबंध का विषय कही पीछे छूट गया है, उदहारण: भारत को अपने गुणों से विश्व को प्रेरणा प्रदान करनी चाहिए, इसे आप ऐसे लिखते की पर्यटन का विकास करके भारत को प्रेरणा देनी चाहिए तो विषय संगत लगता |

      आपने अच्छा प्रयास किया है, लिखते रहिये, आप में बहुत अच्छा करने की क्षमता है |

    • Hello Bhaz,it was a good try. You conclusion was very well knitted & to the point while precisely the same points were missing in whole essay. We think the explanation part was missing on how cooperative federalism will solve the problems. Though you tried to touch many dimension but they were not explained properly, even the most famous issue of land was not discussed.Local governance was a point well taken. Just research a bit more .You can write very well, that flair was shown in some paras. Keep writing. All the best

    • Hello utkarsh, very well try, you have shown considerable improvement. You language is very gripping now. Your expressions are very clear, you have used appropriate phrases at all needed locations.
      Suggestions:
      Intro requires a little bit more effort, plz try not to reveal your side in the first 2-3 sentences only, this may help build reader’s interest, moreover, will help you in writing a balanced essay.
      Your major section was on India’s military might, use other areas also to prove our assertiveness, Ex our stands in security council.
      You mentioned Yoga, it would have been more effective if you would have mentioned International Yoga Day as our achievement, it would have proved we are not soft state.
      Conclusion was not so conclusion like as you already concluded in the intro.
      You can do very well. Keep writing. All d best.

    • नविन जी आपने सरहनीय प्रयास किया है | आपने बहुत से आयाम लाने की कोशिश की, परन्तु और जोड़े जा सकते थे जैसे की शिक्षा के क्षेत्र में मुलभुत सुविधाओ की कमी, इंटरनेट के लिए जरुरी संसांधन सब के पास कैसे आएंगे इत्यादि |
      विषय आपसे यह जानना चाह रहा था की कक्षा आधारित शिक्षा कुछ सिखाती है या नहीं, आपने बहुत से तर्क दिए, पर विषय से थोड़ा सा भिन्न चले गए आप | आप बहुत अच्छा कर रहे है, बस प्रयास करते रहिये | All d best

  12. Please evaluate my essay on: NJAC – it’s not judiciary or executive but judiciary and executive.
    They are numbered from 2 to 16.

    • Hello Sharma, it was a good try, you have a good knowledge of the issue & the arguments are fine.
      Suggestions:
      Work on your sentence structure, sometimes they are too lengthy, sometimes unable to convey the real meaning.
      Plz try not to write words in fragments (Ex: institut-ion ) and words beyond the margin.
      Normally heading is not preferred in essay, but even if you give them, plz make it feel like one.
      The essay topic do not have a question mark, so you were supposed to defend NJAC, you just wrote points in favor & opposite points were not countered well.
      Overall a satisfactory try, you can improve further, keep writing. All d best.

      • I am really impressed by the speed with which essay has been evaluated. I just wanted to ask if you could give it a score out of 125 so that specific level of preparation can be gauged. Thanks a lot for the feedback.

    • Hello NY a good attempt, your current affairs are strong. Your quoting of reports & statistics at various points lends credibility to your argument.
      Suggestions :
      There is a fine line of difference between equity & equality {Equality focuses on creating the same starting line for everyone. Equity has the goal of providing everyone with the full range of opportunities and benefits – the same finish line}. You wrote equity in topic & equality elsewhere in the essay.

      Plz try not to commit spelling mistakes in first page itself.
      More dimensions can be added. You could have quoted schemes like Bolsa familia or India’s attempt of transferring subsidy in name of women members of family etc initiatives also.
      Your writing skills are good, you can do well in examination, keep writing. All d best.

      • Thanks for the review.
        I have wrongly written equality as equity.
        Will work on your suggestions and try to improve. Especially spelling mistakes.

  13. Hello sharma ji,it is a good attempt. But the topic was ” Climate change, a real threat to global economy “, on which baring 5-7 lines nothing was written. Your arguments are good, but you forgot to connect them to topic given i.e economic impact. In last paras some arguments were not even remotely related to the topic, plz do not fall in trap of increasing length focus on content, even UPSC instruction says it.Your concluding line seems to portray that Climate change should not be taken seriously economically. Do you really want to say that or its a typo ? Marks can fall in range of 30-40. Keep writing. All d best.

    • Hello Sharma ji,Plz check the title again, is it not cyber space ? Again a good attempt, you are well versed with dimensions to be written, if you connect them well with your topic it will fetch you more marks. Section targeted language is not expected from Upsc aspirants. The essay seems a bit lacking in content part (no mention about cyber security policy etc).Just a little more research on topic can help you score very good. Keep writing . All d best

      • Yes, I too think that logically it has to be cyber space but it’s written as cyber security only.
        Is there an improvement with respect to previous essays? What score can I expect?

    • Hello Lalit, it was a good attempt you started from history & brought the discussion till Digital India & PRAGATI. Your content & current affairs are up to the mark.Suggestions:
      Nation building was not focused properly, though you tried to write dimensions of it but even in conclusion the whole picture was missing. The intro seems a bit abrupt, work on it . Connectivity between paras should be focused, the essay seems like a collection of paras written on various aspects of S& T. More dimensions can be added(challenges for S&T, m-governance, etc need to be properly explained). You can do well, keep writing, All d best.

      • I struggle on the connectivity part. Suppose in this essay I am writing on agriculture and next para is about health, how do I connect. And how to do so for every switch between paras.
        If you can give an example, it will really be helpful.

        • One of the simplest approach is to give a subtle hint of idea you are gonna touch in preceding para & then illustrate it in the succeeding para. But the ideas should be connected well, Ex in end of agriculture para you can say about deteriorating health of people due to straw burning, over burden, lack of medical facilities nearby or other reason & then in next para right about health aspect of S&T. Hope it helps.

    • I have mailed both these essays to your email as well. I think this one has slight ordering issue (4& 5 need to be interchanged)
      Thanks a lot. Will number in future. And if you don’t have any problem, will mail in a pdf- It might be convenient for you as well.

      • Hello Lalit, plz put a page number, some pages are not in order. On mail checking is only done if commenting system has some issues. The primary platform for essay submission is site, so that all can benefit.

        • I will make sure to do it next time onward. Unfortunately, I do not have the hard copy with me anymore. I am unable to label the pages now.
          Request you to check the pdf. It has the same pages.
          Thanks for consideration

    • Hello Lalit, this is a nice attempt.Intro is good, current affairs, content all up to the mark.
      Suggestions:
      A little bit improvement for handwriting. Working on your sentence structure you can make it powerful (Ex: focus of education can be qualitative-quantity could have been written in place of your sentence on 2-3rd page).It felt like you wanted to sum up then RTE striked & you again changed the course, please ensure this doesn’t happen. Probably Mr. Imran is from Alwar distt of Rajasthan, plz cross check it once.
      You can do very well , keep writing. All d best

  14. 5 ESSAYS…made pdf to keep the order right.
    https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B5WSrUCv0qfHbkRuSkttUjladm9sRTJoM2xtaWFWelZ1X05r/view?usp=sharing

    https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B5WSrUCv0qfHeE5qbXBTemFVQUdTTENXbVdRU1ZBaUpleEYw/view?usp=sharing

    https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B5WSrUCv0qfHeWRER3lmV094NExiclVEMGx2blBvMHlFOWhF/view?usp=sharing

    https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B5WSrUCv0qfHMjk0OGdpbkpNTzk4dDlDOTlUYXhPUjdFNU1J/view?usp=sharing

    https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B5WSrUCv0qfHc2NWcHJNdXk1Nm81XzNNdXQ2ZjBJaE9BZVBz/view?usp=sharing

    • Hello Ankur, this one is regarding essay ” First Step In Revamping Democracy,….. “. It was a good attempt. You told about the problems ailing Indian media, even used the current aspects that is good.
      Suggestions are :
      Try not to make spelling mistakes, at least not in the opening line. Intro was good but you have not answered all the questions you yourself asked. The essay missed entirely on portraying media as a first step in revamping democracy.
      You can perform very well , just keep writing. All d best.

      • thank you sir.
        will take care answering my ques. and spelling point.
        btw, there were 4 more essay, if you could kindly correct those too.
        One more issue, please recommend some good source for introduction and concluding quotes.

    • The topic ” Development is effective contraceptive ” is incomplete , as in contraceptive of what, plz review it once.
      Coming to essay on “India is superpower of tomorrow “,your approach of explaining various areas like economic might, military might etc is good. Suggestions:
      The intro para looks more like a conclusion, the second one suits more as an intro.
      The topic of essay should be the underlying theme connecting all the paras, as it was missing the essay is looking as a collection of Gs answers on various concurrent topics.
      For quotes you can check our quote page.
      Keep writing. All d best.

      • Hello Ankur, regarding “Corruption is necessary evil “, the essay lost the track, as it was just focused on the corruption it causes, prevention etc. You highlighted many dimensions but more can be added. Plz research a little bit before writing, it will add weight to your arguments,cite reports like corruption perception index etc.
        The other document contain Gs answers, currently we don’t deal with them.
        Keep writing. All d best.

    • Hello, your essay doesn’t seem to be so struggling. Its a good attempt. You have a good knowledge of international affairs. The structural outline of your essay is up to the mark. Suggestions :
      Try not to do cutting etc in 1st page, at least not in the first para. More dimensions can be added( ex: world yoga day, India’s peace keeping force contribution etc). Your arguments are good, but they are not explained well as to how they will contribute in new world order, (ex: the election of a particular leader in a particular party seems to be irrelevant to the topic as such)
      Use quote, statistics etc to give weight to your arguments. You can do well. Just keep writing. All d best.

    • Hello, essay is nicely written. Arguments are good. Suggestions:
      Intro first & second para reiterate the same thing, second one would look better. Try to avoid cutting in exam. More dimension need to be added.Talk a little bit about gender equity.You can quote problems faced by women in combat forces in other countries.Overall, an improved try. 40-45/125. Keep writing. All d best.
      From next essay onward plz write page number & update on our site only. As links in the comment don’t get posted directly, so your last night comment was not shown.

      • size of photo is around 6mb and max limit acceptable is 2mb. so that is why i am sharing through google drive
        one more thing please give me just a sample intro for this topic

  15. PLEASE REVIEW!
    CAN CAPITALISM BRING INCLUSIVE GROWTH?
    “The wings of capitalism fly over promised land, the rich and poor are in awe of its might and grande

    Do they rise to the zenith or fall in dark abyss, in anticipation of answer are the kings, queens & meeks”

    History has been a silent spectator to the designs of men through the ages. But none has been a craft so consuming than capitalism.The disintegration of the feudal Europe, the revelations of scientific temper, the engineered industrial revolution were the pedestal on which stood capitalism. Some clapped, some retorted, some wondered, some surrendered-but none, yes, none could ignore it. It had taken it’s root and gave a clarion call for it’s vision and march.

    The overburdened tillers of the land, subjected to much trials by their feudal masters saw new hope. They migrated to work in factories, for fixed wages and working hours. ‘Private property’ soon gained new grounds.The hard earned money could now be invested and the riches furthered. It was an opportunity, denied to none, and the hereditary right of none. This structural shift in economic activity brought about multi-dimensional changes. In the political arena it translated into democracy and in the social life it emphasized on individualism. Having captured the imagination of the West, it didn’t take long for the East to embrace it as well.

    The fall of the “Berlin Wall” was the tipping point for capitalism. For the statesman realized that they can’t bear the burden of the masses through their utopian ideas of communism. And the world has never looked back since then. Countries of the North America and Europe are the most revered nations of our time. With high standards of living, greater access to resources and some of the world’s best social and human infrastructure they lead the global affairs. It’s no wonder then, that their pre-independent colonies today are following suit and embracing a more free-market economy with reduced state interference. The emerging world economies- India, Brazil, Africa and the likes of them are all witnessing,contrary to popular perceptions, greater equity and fairer justice.

    Critiques may be wary but the fact of the matter is that the world has never been a better place to live in. We all hail the post-90s reforms for having done the deal for India, don’t we? Inclusiveness has been insured through the vertical mobility that capitalism ensures. It’s the talent and ability that counts in it. Capitalism cuts across social divides- be it it caste or gender. It doesn’t judge with what one was born with but appreciates the inherent capacity with which one can contribute. It promotes entrepreneurship, nurtures ‘risk-taking’ rather than ‘dependency’, and a economy driven by market forces.

    Capitalism has transformed the segregated world into one global village. It has brought in the forces of globalization, liberalization and modernization. The sleeping rural life is waking up and reaping the benefits of a more connected social and economic order. Life expectancy. literacy rates and gender equity is leveling up to the world standards. People today are more aware and informed of their surroundings and make intelligent life choices. Anarchy and autocratic rule can’t thrive under capitalism. So a democratic order strengthens and re-energizes itself in consonance with the principles of capitalism.

    Sure there have been allegations of a brewing divide and hidden social tensions. The rich is getting richer and cornering all to himself. But can capitalism be convicted for it? Some people will always prosper more than others be it in any economic or social scenario, like they always have, through the dawn of humanity. It’s in the nature of man to compete, to better himself than others. What we need to ask is that is capitalism furthering it or is it in anyway inclined to better the life chances of a certain sections? History is proof of it that throughout civilizations, there have been extremes of cases. The rulers ruled and the common lot suffered unspeakable hardships. The tyranny and the sanctity of the haves was not to be questioned. But today, people can question, voice their rage. Their is no godly owner. Opportunistic freedom gives everyone the right to gain to the best of ones’ ability.

    The lacuna may be in the exaction of implementation but never in the principles of capitalism itself. Governments, citizens and other stakeholders need to plug the gaps where they lack in extracting the best out of capitalistic spirits. Bureaucratic hurdles, red-tapism, corrupt collusions and greed of a few is defacing the virtue of what is a vice free economic order.The nations are fraternizing and reaching common grounds at various international platforms such as the UN, WTO, and the likes of them.To now be chanting the woes of something which can’t be avoided, would be seeking ways to revert back to the medieval ways.

    There is no denying that capitalism is here to stay no matter how much the narcissist pray otherwise. We should be thankful for what we have and strive to rise with the prevailing tide , then swim against it and fight the waves.

    • Hello Romilla, its a good attempt. Intro is very beautifully written. The words are so powerfully weaved in sentences that reader craves for more.Your ideas make one think very deeply.
      Suggestions:
      Your essay looks more like an abstract of a novel, while essay should end in itself.
      You should explain concepts, ideas more clearly to completely convince the examiner with your view point.
      It would be an added advantage to add current events to give it an orientation for civil services examination.
      Overall, a good attempt, you can write very well. All d best !!!

      • Thanks for your valued feedback. You guys are doing a great job, taking time out to further someone else’s cause! I have taken a mental note of your suggestions. Will try to be less vague the next time.

        • Hi Romilla!
          Thanks for your trust in us. Yes, we will start our ethics section very soon. We would be giving case studies for practice with elaborate model answers. U may also send your own questions answers of this paper for feedback.

  16. PLEASE REVIEW !!
    REASONS FOR CHENNAI RAINS AND FUTURE PREPAREDNESS

    A natural disaster is termed as something which is unforeseen, severe and immediate but the type of disasters that India witnessed in the recent times ranging from J&K floods to Uttarakhand floods and now the most recent and devastating Chennai floods cannot be simply termed as a result of nature’s fury as these were foreseen because of the constant intrusion of human beings into the territory of nature.

    This was not the first time that Chennai experienced such amount of rains but what turned it into a disaster was the same amount of rains in lesser time. This can be attributed to the climate change which has changed the rainfall patterns and the monsoon cycle .An exceptionally strong el-nino coupled with a strong NE monsoon led to widespread devastation. These rains would not have caused so much havoc if encroachment into flood plains was not done, area of lakes was not curtailed and course of rivers was not changed.

    Apart from mindless urbanization; lack of proper planning led to widespread destruction. Rampant building violations have become feature of so-called development. Inadequate drainage network only added fuel to the fire. Main water drainage network in Chennai- Cooum River, Adyar River and Buckingham palace were not spared either. Encroachments on these river systems led to rise in water levels further.

    Coastal areas are very prone to disasters like cyclones and floods. Presence of wetlands and mangrove forests act as a shield to coastal areas. But it is highly unfortunate that wetlands are constantly shrinking paving way to IT hubs and big buildings. This served as another cause for the Chennai floods.

    After experiencing such devastating floods its time that Government of India changes its strategy to tackle disasters. Our strategy focuses mainly on post-disaster scenario-relief and rehabilitation; that too not in a highly efficient manner. It is the time we focus on the causes of disaster and think of ways through which we can prevent such man-made disasters from happening; it is time to rethink the planning and layout of cities that are becoming a cause of destruction rather than furthering our growth prospects.

    Proper planning involving all relevant stakeholders is the need of the hour. After the Tsunami of 2004; GOI took a commendable step by forming National Disaster Management Authority but this body has not been given significant powers. NDMA should be involved in the planning process. National Green Tribunal also should have greater enforcement powers. Economic activities need to be reduced on already fragile coastal areas if we don’t want to experience more devastating floods and cyclones in the future. Need is to work on early warning system so that people are prepared for the impending disaster. Better forecasting and identification of vulnerable zones so that reckless urbanization does not take place is very vital. Improvement in drainage systems is also very important.

    Not only government but civil society can also contribute towards disaster prevention. Deforestation, increasing emission of CFCs, increasing air and water pollution are some of the factors responsible for climate change leading to extreme events. So, civil society can take initiatives for afforestation, curbing pollution and discouraging use air conditioners so that CFCs content is reduced can be done to make some positive change in the environment.

    Future course of action should be more oriented towards prevention aspects but we cannot ignore the mitigation aspects as well. Even if such sort of disaster happens, stress should be to minimize the impact of it. There is a wide scope of improvement in relief and rehabilitation work. There is a need to increase manpower for relief work. Although there is a separate disaster force in India known as National disaster response force; it has not been seen as very active in the recent disasters. Need is to revitalize NDRF with the help of increased manpower and technology so that it alone is capable of handling the post-disaster scenario.

    Floods in Chennai should serve as an eye-opener for the kind of devastating future we are heading to. Now it is time to work in harmony with nature and go for sustainable development because we don’t want to give our future generations a place with flourishing buildings and corporate houses without trees, fresh air, pure water and a constant threat of an impending disaster. Time is to think and change the development strategy for a better future.

    • Hello Aanchal, sorry for the delay in checking, our notification system is experiencing some technical glitches.
      Coming to your essay. The topic is very confined, seems more like a GS question than essay, but still you tried to attempt it well. Your positives are:
      Knowledge of the topic
      Infusion of related current affairs
      Multi dimensional analysis
      Good intro style
      Suggestions for improvement :
      The paragraphs are very small they just look like you touched the point & flew away( like in GS answers), infuse a little explanation in them.
      Essay lacks the flow, it seems more like an a series of para & not an essay.

      Seeing it, as your initial shot at essay, it looks good. Keep writing you can improve a lot.
      If comfortable try a full fledged essay topic may be from previous UPSC papers, it will help you a lot.

      Keep writing All d best !!!!

      • sir can you please review this essay.

        TECHNOLOGY CANNOT REPLACE MANPOWER

        Roots of technology can be traced back to renaissance that took place in 16th century Europe. It led to a lot of inventions which played a great role in overall development of society. Its most important contribution was that it ultimately led to the abolishment of a malpractice of “slavery”. About 200 years ago it was an impossible thing to connect with someone who is miles away. This was done by postmen who took a long time in delivering messages but this was completely changed by discovery of telephone by Alexander graham bell. There are various instances like this where technology has made our life easier by replacing manpower.

        Today Technology has made our lives way too much comfortable by making our work more productive, efficient and faster. Technology has been a constant companion to human progress. It has evolved to a great extent with our changing needs.

        Technology as a tool has led to growth in wide array of sectors. It has fastened the industrial processes leading to higher economic growth. In education system, concept of smart classes has facilitated the teaching process in an interesting manner. In medicine, robots are being used for intricate operations ; also nanobots for effective medicine delivery is being developed. It has contributed a lot to our knowledge of universe. Technology in agriculture introduced through green revolution of 1960s turned India from a food scarce country to a food surplus country. “Digital india programme” has led India towards a new level of growth. But the issue is whether our vision of technology is as a tool under human control or something which can replace human effort completely.

        Still there are various reasons why technology cannot completely takeover manpower. Technology lacks a lot of features which only humans can have. Emotions the most important aspect of humans cannot be programmed in robots. For instance, in education, technology cannot replace human teachers as robots will not have emotions nor they can teach moral education to pupils which can only come through pupil to pupil interaction. Also, motivating students to do better cannot be done by a machine.
        Discretion is another thing which is inbuilt in humans; they can make better decisions. A big failure of technology was seen in a recent crash of an automated google car because it was not able to act spontaneously. Humans are able to understand dilemmas and how to take decisions which is not simply a thing of mechanistic interpretation. Similarly, technology cannot replace the soldiers fighting for our motherland.

        Sensitivity, humanity, love, compassion are some of the emotions that are present in humans which helps them to do their duty with all the more dedication; these cannot be ingrained in machines. There are a lot of fields where humans are most important like psychiatrists, administration, HR departments, and counselors. Even if it become possible for technology to replace manpower here we should not let that happen.

        Also, we need to see the social costs attached if technology takes over manpower completely. First time a conflict between manpower and technology was witnessed in “industrial revolution of England”. Many workers were losing jobs due to the advent of machines like spinning wheel, steam engine etc. This led to a movement called “luddism” which was against the rising technology as it was seen as a threat to jobs of workers. Gandhiji was also against technology replacing manpower. He referred to the idea of machines replacing manpower as ‘satanic’.

        Technology as a tool can lead to high employment levels as witnessed in 1990s in service sector but technology replacing manpower will lead to widespread unemployment leading to high poverty. In India, we will have a great working age population by 2026 and therefore we cannot even think of the consequences of replacing manpower at all.

        Also, man is a social animal but technology taking over can lead to a divided society where peer-to-peer interaction will vanish; a trend we are witnessing today; a phenomenon put succinctly by Einstein when he said “I fear the day when technology overlaps our humanity. It will be then that the world will have permanent ensuing generations of idiots.”

        India has a huge cultural diversity. Each culture has its own traditional handicrafts like ikat of telangana; pashmina shawls of jammu and Kashmir ; khurja pottery of UP etc. which if taken over by technology will lead to the loss of the authenticity and cultural value they have.

        Said that, we should make the use of technology for the betterment of society wherever possible. There are various fields today where we need technology to replace manpower. For instance, technology in scavenging to end the practice of “manual scavenging”. Similarly, hazardous works like mining should be taken over by technology for easing man’s life. All the works that are impossible for humans to do can be done with the help of technology like space missions. Also, disaster management operations in difficult terrains can be done by technology as they put humans’ lives at risk.

        Question here is not whether technology can replace manpower or not ; question is whether it should replace manpower. We have seen devastating effects of technology from Hiroshima bombing to Chernobyl disaster along with the prosperity that technology has brought in our lives. No doubt technology has made our lives easier but it is possible only when its under human control.

        Technology should only be seen as a supplement to human effort not as a replacement. Humans should always control technology, not the other way round as a noted historian Christian Lange once said “Technology is a useful servant but a dangerous master”.

        • Hello, AaNchaL
          You have done serious efforts in developing your essay writing skills. You tried for a multidimensional analysis with an infusion of current affairs that is very apt.

          Suggestions are :
          Reading the essay actually became a roller coaster ride with ups & downs.Just when the flow was getting built, suddenly in next para the momentum seemed lost. Please try to maintain the momentum.
          The third paragraph can be made a good intro.
          Explain the point a little bit then move towards other point. The essay losses coherence when more than one points are stressed in one para so please look to it.

          A good effort, you have the capability to improve further. Keep writing All d best !!!

          One more thing please next time post in a new comment, we were unable to find it initially as it was between the old comments.
          On a lighter note is your optional history ?

          • thanks for the review….i am actually finding it difficult to maintain depth as well as multidimensional analysis…when i take many points it lacks in depth…what should i do?…should i just take 1 idea per paragraph?

            no, my optional is PSIR…i find history very difficult 😀

          • One theme per paragraph is fine. We have seen candidates mentioning less number of ideas in essay,but lucid explanation and they scored very well in examination. You can also do the same.
            Your mention of Industrl revln, ludding etc gave a sign that may be your optional is history.
            and nothing is easy in upsc , not even PSIR 🙂

  17. TECHNOLOGY
    CANNOT REPLACE MANPOWER

    The human brain is the ultimate source of creativity
    and it is man who created machines. The debate between primacy of technology
    and manpower is very prominent nowadays. However great marbles technology may
    have achieved it is the human brain which controls it. The scenes of the movie
    terminator reminds one that may be machines takeover the humans and rule but
    that is totally hypothetical and confined to science fictions only. The
    dominance of human brain can only be understood by the mere fact that in 12000
    years the Homo erectus has turned into a social animal capable of landing in
    moon and sending probe to mars and distant galaxy. Although many of the human
    functions have been overtaken by machines, it cannot be said that human brain
    is gradually turning ideal. Human brain alone has the sole primacy of creating
    and controlling actions which machines are intended to do.

    The advents of modern technology begin with the
    industrial revolution that started in England. The initial machines that
    replaced man were the steam engine, Power loom and the blast furnace. The mass
    production of steel started building up of new feats and marvels of technology
    like massive ships, industries and war machines. The proverb that human necessity
    drive invention is righty said and it is with every new obstacle that human
    beings strive towards new feats and marvels of science. The capitalism which
    was begun in England due to increasing requirements of growing population was
    supplemented by a revolution in agriculture to provide food to the growing
    population.

    Then came the two world wars which necessitated the
    discovery of new machines and replacing old and dilapidated ones. The massive
    built up of arms and ammunitions and the new warplanes which ruled the skies
    like never before. Man thousand years back could have never imagined that they
    could fly twice or thrice the speed of sound. Yea now it is possible.

    This trend of discovery has set in various ripple
    effects in terms of environmental degradations. The massive energy guzzling
    engines are increasing the carbon footprints of the earth and as a result
    adverse weather events like sea level rise, the depletion of polar ice caps,
    increased incidents of droughts and floods, shift of habitat, loss of
    biodiversity and drying of lakes etc are more prominent. Combined international
    effort is needed to tackle this menace. Although annual climate change
    conventions are held but with no outcomes in terms of binding emission cuts.

    Similarly
    the technological revolution has brought in the process of globalization, no
    country is self sufficient now. There is a complex network of give and take
    between nations. Trade is now liberalized, new multilateral forums are being
    formed with liberalized trade forums through removal of tariff and non tariff
    barriers. The natural barriers are being broken. Tunnels are getting dugged
    through the andes, may be some day through Himalayas also. Trade routes across
    countries are getting constructed.

    Socially
    globalizations have set in a process of loss of indigenous cultures like
    oriental culture is getting replaces by the western culture. This cultural
    invasion has been followed by a counter revolution interms of glocalization and
    protection.

    The
    poor and the marginalized is getting exploited due to international completion.
    Governments commitments towards conventions and trade treaties has led to
    withdrawl from sectors of welfare. Thus the poor in third works counties and
    least developed nations of Africa are repeatedly starving.

    Conflicts
    are also rising due to strategic competitions in market, economy and
    dominations over small nations. In terms of international relations it has been
    observed that many nations fought among themselves due to conflict of inters.
    Similarly it has been seen that in the present day nation in orders to capture
    market and secure their long term interest are fighting among themselves
    through various foras.

    However
    evil may be the effects of the techno and industrialization, it is this that
    has brought changes in the life’s of many. Revolution in the fields of
    medicine, satellite connectivity, telecommunication, information revolution,
    nuclear power, renewable power has made lives east. Travelling is now very
    east, high speed trains take man to furthest corners of the country in bery
    short time. Air travels has made international travel east, erstwhile life
    threatening diseases like cholera, typhoid, cancer etc can now be treated
    easily without any problem. Satellites have made flow of information very easy.
    Today any event in nay corner of the earth can be delivered in matter of
    seconds.

    However
    with all these positives there are negatives also, the first atom bomb that
    went off in Nagasaki has led to death of millions for several generations, the
    Chernobyl nuclear disaster, the Three Mile Island nuclear test has been the
    stark reminders how technology could be misuse or get things wrong. Similarly
    the increasing terrorist activities, with the help of weapons are threatening
    the very survival of humans.

    Global
    warming has brought in many diseases like zika, ebla, anthrax that was never
    heard before.

    The
    technology that man has created has brought rapid changes to the lives of
    mankind. However the debate whether man or machines which one is superior cannot
    be won over through mere speculation. Man is the master of everything today. He
    controls all forms of objects, living and nonliving. Although machines has
    replaced many of the works man used to do earlier still in various fields man
    dominates. Say for examples the reproduction of human beings, the vital
    functions of the human body cannot be replaced by machines. Only thing that
    technology can do is to rectify the problems. Artificial synthetic liver,
    kidneys can be used but with limitation. The rule of nature cannot be violated
    by man as it is set by god.

    There
    has been a school of thought in geography called the determinist who believed
    that man is the dust of the dust of the earth and that human existence are
    determined by nature and that man can modify the flow of a river but cannot
    reverse it. So it s evident that although machines and technology has invaded
    our day to day life it cannot replace the rules of nature and man is going to
    dominate the earth for centuries to go. The advent of scientific man which
    ushered in the 16th century is going to survive long. This period of Holocene
    and anthropocene is a remarkable in the history of earth as like dinasuars man
    is not going to be eliminated totally, any cataclysmic event even of the nature
    of global extinction cannot replace man, he is going to survive somehow, deep
    beneath the surface of earth or high above in the outer space, in explants or
    in any planet of the solar system.

    As
    has been rightly said that innovations and invention is the prime of human mind.

    Productivity
    is never an accident. It is always the result of a commitment to excellence,
    intelligent planning, and focused effort.

    Paul
    J. Meyer

    • Hello Partha, your attempt is good, but you need to improve a lot.
      Your positive are:
      Your tried to bring many dimension, historical, social, geographical, environmental etc
      Use of quote is good.
      Suggestions:
      Plz try to stick to the topic.
      There is no cohesion in the paras, they seem answers to different gs questions & don’t make an overall impact as an essay.
      Invoke the dimensions, but explain there relevance of the to the topic.
      You can improve a lot. Keep writing. All d best !!!

  18. topic – Trust take years to Build, Seconds to Break

    ‘Subah ka nashta Kabul mein, dopahar ka khana Lahore mein aur rat ka khana Delhi mein’(breakfast at Kabul, lunch at Lahore and dinner at delhi) these are the words which must have echoed through the hearts of many Indians and also our PM Modiji when he made the surprise stop at Lahore to wish his Pakistani counterpart on his birthday. The thaw, the warmth, the trust in the relationship was a surprise for the most people as they were not aware of the backchannel talks that had been going on for a long period. Then the Pathankot happened. A group of six armed combatants infiltrated through the international border and attacked the Pathankot airbase. Apart from lives of soldiers, there was one main casualty the India-Pak relationship. The trust that was built over years was broken in a second.

    Trust is a sine-qua-non for any healthy relationship. It is like climbing top of mountain you take time to get to top but one wrong mistake and it all ends. It is generated through care, warmth , affection, kindness , honesty , truthfulness and lot more things. It is that abstract concept that makes the relationships click.

    Trust is one such commodity that India has huge reserves of. Our values of sarva dharma sambhav , Vasudev Kutumbkam, Satyamev Jayate signify our ideals in 3Ts – trust, truthfulness and tolerance . Trust is our soft power that makes us stand out from the rest. Recently Chinese premier has also said India had dominated China for over 2000years without sending a single man. The civilizational history of India is fertile with values of trust and humanity where leaders like Ashoka, Akbar have left their indelible imprints. In modern times leaders like Nehru, Gandhi, Maulana Azad, Bhagat Singh, Ambedkar have kept their traditions alive. They have given us the constitution which preserves and nourishes our trust and tolerance.

    But of late there have been some incidents which can undo the years of work of our great leaders and break the bonds of trust. The diversity that they championed has been attacked. Take for eg the Dadri lynching incident where a man of minority community was beaten to death under the presumption that he consumed beef. Similarly a youth was forced to take his life as he was a dalit.

    Our leaders like Gandhiji who have fought Caste system have also stood against the atrocities of racism. They exerted the necessary pressure on the world to prohibit racism. But today racial attacks like the one on Tanzanian girl in Bangalore dot the country. Our great leaders also supported the independence movement of African and Asian countries. Our pharmaceutical industry has continued there tradition of trust and has acted as affordable and medical service provider to these underdeveloped nations. But the recent incident where our PM supposedly gave the private assurances to Multinationals to not use compulsory licensing clause is like breaking the trust.

    Take another leader Nehru who laid the foundation of our modern science established the temples of modern India. Have we kept up with our tryst with science ? If the last Indian science congress or the lack of spending in R&D is anything to go by then surely answer would be in negative.

    Fortunately there is a silver lining. There are still areas where we have fared well, where we have continued trust building activity. These areas range from implementing democratic values right from grassroots level to support of island nations ravaged by the surging climate changes. We have provided largest peace keeping forces in the civil war ravaged nations . We have continued to oppose and object the unjust like the nuclear world order.

    We have let ourselves down but have not failed . The future lies in making amends and following in with development of trust with all stakeholders. The 3Ts- trust, truth and tolerance have to be adopted in all walks of life. Recent acts of government to reach out to minorities, the backward and deprived through schemes like Nai Manzil, Stand up india , Mudra Bank are a great beginning. With Pakistan a new trust building phase has started with sharing of intelligence information related to terrorist crossing border by Pakistani NSA. Joint probe into terror attack is going on and who knows may be just like Modiji we all can have breakfast at Kabul, lunch at Lahore and Dinner at Delhi.

      • Hello briganzza, topic is nicely selected, you have a good command over current affairs as well as Indian history.
        The suggestions are :
        You restricted topic to India only,
        more dimensions can be added
        the essay diverted from its topic
        for upsc aspirant it is advisable to refrain from using controversial mentions
        You can do very well, keep trying all d best !!!

  19. India’s Red Line campaign to curb over-the-counter use of antibiotics is finding recognition, and could be adopted on a world scale. Discuss the objectives and significance of this campaign.

    Launched in february 2016 by the Ministry of Health and family welfare,’The red line campaign’ is a thrust to counter threat of the superbug.

    The objectives of the campaign are as described:

    1.To put labeling standards on the irrationally sold antimicrobial drugs and to curb their over consumption without doctor’s prescription.

    2.To prevent drug resistance amongst the public ,observing a sharp decline in their effectiveness.

    3.To mitigate the cases of neonatal sepsis which are seen in India,the highest in the world.

    4.To accentuate immunisation and infection control measures.

    5.To ensure sustainable access along with sustainable effectiveness of anti biotic

    The significance of the campaign is that:

    1.The increasing disease burden,easy affordability of many drugs,their frequent consumption for cold and viral infections has evolution in bacteria thus making them ineffective,

    2.this resistance is also because of deceptive measures taken by patients under treatment of fatal diseases like tuberculosis,i.e. stopping the doses midway,

    3.the use of anti microbials in animal feed has the same effect on them and thus we are devoid of healthy animal products,

    4.also the lack of priority based prescription of these drugs by doctors,some are pressurized by patients demand for quick relief whereas some are incentivised by chemists and pharmaceutics is a big problem.

    5.through this campaign the prevention of sale of third and fourth generation antibiotics is possible.

    • Hello Inderjeet
      It seems it is your initial tryst with essay. You are versed with current affairs thats a good thing, but you need to do a lot of brain storming. The essay is a lot diverted from the original topic. Please read the topic again and again before writing. It will help you to write as per the demand of the topic.Moreover, don’t contradict yourself in the middle of essay, you first wrote about religious hero worshiping and then wrote a quote which justifies the other way round.
      One more suggestion please if possible avoid writing religion or person specific comments until and unless they are not widely proven in public realm.
      You can do very well.
      Keep writing all d best !!!

  20. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/77681be6d8d0d73ab48349a07453af1f379a951ccf8a0f580d330c5f4685df06.jpg https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/b51d9e97cff9431bfb3bf94ab075b801bb9f204fe212cdabb489f66007a08528.jpg https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/72395a9e08eed20f5ba8d68840333cfd7b1ab204f3e6f3624aaceb47d0c094e5.jpg https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/4bf5a856d144501633cc190b33c5e90c9ff0d0f8997ce8148ed333ee752f7b71.jpg https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/1e6b032054a8d0222e420e3ef186d86e4e5b65bccfb7966770b4fd04283b4c34.jpg https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/7bbb005e7e292aad35bf119f2d7ecf54d06e28978c320300ecccb784d94cc92c.jpg Dear PnE Team, can you please evil my essay on topic:
    25 Years since 1991 Economic Reforms: How has India changed and where is India heading?

  21. my another essay:
    Topic: Rome wasn’t built in a day
    Page 1:
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/5ba8003facb89751bb6b7c0b165168f21b8bbcdd9690f43fd209f167eb8b2915.jpg
    Page 2:
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/8e17fa456fa2116157f4e5d8a9ffeec5a3ffa6cf90ad17c582b76c148db58e0e.jpg
    Page 3:
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/623ab5c34a9d547972984292ae89899dbb45d019304f55175ce03fe43f14d38f.jpg
    Page 4:
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/cf39850f491c6b38bec08138bbc79ce5c34ec9a27ff16dc02756932a048941b1.jpg
    Page 5:
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/e69d01e2ad7dd459e4295a08d76cb3849febbc07dfc2e88280a99cf1310c9434.jpg
    Page 6:
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/304247d0e67ea18caea0b6080a3f598e1c9ed30a73ba5c4189f31b44e2a682f9.jpg

    • Hello Pablo, the essay is good. In statement based essays keeping the essay on track is a big deal but you managed to keep up to topic with few digression. Suggestions are :
      Please do not do factual mistake at least in opening line (Rome talked here is not an Indian city).
      Try to improve your handwriting to make it clear for examiner.
      The essay lacks a bit of flow
      please add current affairs and make the essay multidimensional

      You can do very well. All d best !!!

      • Thank you sir for the encouragement and the comprhensive review. will keep in mind about your feedback in my next essays

        Can I post more essays for the review. I am doing self study and I don’t have anybody around for the review, especially Essays

  22. give them books, not tools
    medium : hindi
    sir, review plz

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/622b2a6f46d32c7b49d3e70c31b0f43a8ed0c62b6bf1ecc4aac72efec3b3defe.jpg

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/0658058ebf7269dac104958826bbadcf5755b530b41750048a45db504b400888.jpg

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/6456c6e9b08f30146a201784b5ca6579ca9b1a9dcbca0ac62d927f6bf2382452.jpg

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/64531670e46510b4f5137ddbfb99d564dd7c835bb64802a654db2387a473972c.jpg

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/5aa7107a125c5227ddc93d4fb9f3bd4e0558dbea886ad13394b0a70e420df174.jpg

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/021f7d36c0004409c19f4645cd05caf33ecd8e70a5db6e1f59db86ed27900890.jpg

    • hello Manish
      आपके पास वक्तकवयो का अच्छा ज्ञान है जिसे आपने बखूबी इस्तेमाल भी किया है | आपके पास समसामयिकी का अच्छा ज्ञान है | कोशिश कीजिये की प्रथम पंक्ति में वर्तनी की गलतिया न हो (जैसे मनुष्य ) | यह आलेख अपनी मूल भावना से थोड़ा सा भटक गया है | इसे और बहु आयामी बनाया जा सकता है |
      आप प्रत्यन करते रहे | All d best !!!

      • धन्यवाद
        वैसे मनुष्य लिखा मैंने और मनुष्य तो वर्तनी की दृष्टि से सही है न
        मूल मुद्दे से भटकाव, खराब लेखनी मेरी समस्या रही है अगले प्रयास में मैं और ज्यादा अच्छे का प्रयास करुगा

          • ok sir धन्यवाद,
            मेरी लेखनी के साथ यह समस्या रही है …यह बहुत खराब है ,. इस पर मुझे काफी काम करना है

  23. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/96b2cf339f492a8dfeab9671729a89a53c061ca1abde119409cc322c7e4d7fde.jpg https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/ed0a6d2b4d648b01f4ad004fc5a0c20f50ebf1f38388a4f56c4e8e9786c2da88.jpg https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/531435094c1f1f227a7e162b8ad386d21efb455858711f83bebacec68d6a271d.jpg https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/20a31a0b52125437d2ad332e89e393ac643da7a75e0990badefebeacca4ccf8f.jpg https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/98274a7bb7d5d99440ff4ae9e521c95a5a13e7095706bb3d3c91cd61aab4b546.jpg https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/ba3ae915a241a504d36494a0ab1f1539c381668227bcac430bd04e402eeb1dbf.jpg https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/7e1cacb5e4a485e4bbfd83cc7d5226cb4e45d83da37a35bd81eb197a93419191.jpg https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/4cb0d95e93a791a0d25c9ab11afc3554fae1453a51e7b63547294ae9a79af001.jpg https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/84af997f13f4329b2a4d56d0a32a5b101bdb72bb69649dce9e51033e8e50a143.jpg

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  25. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/b9b6cb00b8aef457a2d708f8c0d95732cd938ebe91ab4e0f30682454a5f6c62a.jpg https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/aae8b2a4473a55ec486c380e55aa423ed0ffae5f3b87aeab1e716bdab2cff41f.jpg https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/6492fe852cfe617cd20b5449156a385d2749108b3ee414573dd5107f61f16d1f.jpg https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/b28d8ef16b1e1dce93be72a7fae2302eb78f595dd305859d210582d4ff6c6e7a.jpg https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/f7dde5b3ed16164356841058b45c2abc61bd2d9b14c0a8de5bd3b5271fa89995.jpg https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/6202ec84896283db2ab708e08dcadeaa97e25fd34485036f0ed5261ef5fdd9b2.jpg https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/1a5c715d31cf0f160e6e1812406ba825ce78d331f3c810c7fc9cc983d99287a5.jpg https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/ea7b6488da4df27bfb6eabb51bda9e4802041208195d5c245287aeeaa5b9bde5.jpg https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/35a412a7f4f5aa4601ace192f0eed5a0ffb17434d4cebac8ed0df3a1d263f4b1.jpg

      • ok. I got it
        thanks for the reply
        Its just that Mains are just 30 days ahead, and we aspirants want your team to review some more essays in this month

        • We are really sorry for the unavailability of team at that time to help you, but we are again ready to evaluate. Will be waiting for your essays

  26. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/751876aae1de1d5269eff78f149a93622affa8530000924926afa54c68b85235.jpg https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/0a474a0ff71f64f5008bdb66ea7baece1d05e2954c948388696c7c9bbb52cad6.jpg https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/cdcadb3c5c40554d167b7756a2f2d2c1bd9324a4457b76e99b150163799a3589.jpg https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/d2c40da44b98bdacf57443a91321f370b9b624ce7782150e92cc4841f515750a.jpg https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/46396e5d44e866ecc26872bd2471dbb8d17514324f367fb9c582df78744226e2.jpg https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/d29ccb3139bbd92fd72315485f3ed0ec3e4ae6b2d4a58fa78efbf19c9f919586.jpg https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/2342d79c6d466e680941d42c0948fa0ae03d56a86e141344e08ba616d2649763.jpg https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/bda2e97108b15e580287e64e90e8e9f9c895ad7979e25086fa4ffb33ad064da1.jpg https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/dcca8e61f8a3ffbe1a5e595ad90ecc0e1f50711a0a9ab420678acd3ee90684be.jpg

    • Hello @disqus_kDsH8d0Rrj:disqus , very sorry that the notification system faulted and we were unable to review your essay in time. Your essay has many positives like :
      1. knowledge of current affairs
      2 a fair understanding of the issue
      3. varied dimension related to the topic
      The suggestion from our side are :

      1. Dont do any grammatical mistake in first para not so in the first line itself
      2. Dont do cutting etc atleast on the first page.
      3. Your essay has content but it is very haphazardly placed hence it fails to leave an impact. Try to organise your thoughts this will give it a flow.
      4. Just try to deal with a sub topic in the para pertaining to it, if you linger it on, it will seem as it the whole essay pertains to that point only
      5. Add some more specific points, schemes and areas to make the essay look current

      You can do well. All d best for your exam!!!

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